Family, Friends & Fellow Officers Remember...

Deputy Sheriff Joshua Thomas Rutherford

Blaine County Sheriff's Office, Montana

End of Watch Thursday, May 29, 2003

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Reflections for Deputy Sheriff Joshua Thomas Rutherford

HEY JOSH
I LOVE YOU LITTLE BROTHER
I MISS YOU TO
LOVE JODY

December 16, 2005

Josh, Mike and I got back from Chinook last night, after 5 long days of listening to the defense try to get the court to spare your life. It is not over yet. This sentencing hearing will probably go on until Wednesday of next week. We will not be able to be there, when the judge actually passes sentence. Going into this, I would have been happy with either sentence. But, after watching him smile and wave at his family, I want him to be sentenced to death. He has no remorse for what he has done, and neither does his family. They got to tell the court how they would feel if you were put to death, and we did not. They tried to paint a picture of an abused child and one that suffers from a fetal alcohol disorder of some sort. I don't believe that for one minute. He knew then and he knows now what he did that night. He does not deserve to live.
Your mom and Tammy did such a great job on their impact statements. They are both great people. I got to know them a little better during this time, and I am really glad that I did. Josh, I am so very angry that I did not have a chance to get to know you better. That coward, Laurence D. Jackson Jr. took that chance away from me, and for that I cannot and will not be forgiving. I miss you a lot. I felt you in the courtroom with us, watching over all of us. Hang on for a few more days and this will finally be over. Carlo and Yvonne have done an excellent job during this ordeal. Mike and I are going to get a special ornament for our christmas tree this year for you. We will put it on our tree every year from now on. Happy holidays, my nephew.

Melody Zuhoski
Aunt of Deputy Joshua T. Rutherford

December 3, 2005

Well Josh, today the sentencing is in its 4th day and I am so sorry that I cannot be there. All your other family is there in support of you though. Your dad, sisters, brothers, Mom, and aunts and Uncles. I get emails and phone calls from them all updating everything and I think about you all the time, everyday and when I read the paper on what is happening with it or hear something from somebody, I get upset all over again. I am sorry and I know one should forgive and forget, but this is not ever going to happen here. I get ticked off when I see that your son gets on the stand and tells everyone that he misses you and wants you back and then someone offers your killer a tissue? I dont think so. Let him look your sons in their eyes and let him tell them why he did this to them. Will he do that? NO! So I cannot forgive and forget.
I will always keep you in thoughts and prayers along with all those left behind.
Love ya,
Aunt Kerri

Kerri Flitcroft, aunt of Josh

December 1, 2005

My Grandson,
Well today is finally the day of the sentencing and I can't be there. I had heart surgery last Wednesday in Billings and I'm supposed to take it easy for awhile. I did so want to be there when the death sentence is given. If not that, then 100 years in prison without the chance of parole. That man should never again be free to walk the streets a free man! The Bible said, An eye for an eye, but that was Mosaic law and went out with the birth of Jesus Christ, so we can't go with that anymore, much as we would like to. Your dad will be there and I think Lewis and Angela also. So will Loren. I'm sorry I can't be there, but my thoughts will be there with you.
Tatanka Ska Winya - White Buffalo Woman
Your Grandmother- Ruby Rasor

Ruby Rasor Grandmother

November 28, 2005

Hi Joshman...well only a few more days to go. There is so many from here planning on being there for you. I am looking forward to seeing your mom while she is here. I miss you alot

DC

November 25, 2005

hey baby brother,
i miss you very much..
watch over mom please...

love your sister
jody

November 19, 2005

Son,

Well yesterday, the request for a new trial was turned down. His reason for a request was Yvonne's closing arguments. I think that we will now move onto the penalty phase. You knew what my feelings are on that.

If only I could see your smile once more. I chipped off part of your headstone and put it in your memory box that I am making for your sons. I knew you were suprized when I found the certificates for participating in sports at Wheat Ridge sports. That little gray ribbon that you won at Edgewater. I am so glad that I saved them.

I will be leaving Denver on the 26th and I am flying to Great Falls which I know amuses you to no end because I was so scared to fly. I can almost hear you telling me that it will be okay. Even when the plane flew around Denver for two hours.

Well my baby son, I love and miss you. Every day that passes is one day closer to you. Christmas is so hard because I had such fun shopping for you, your sisters and my grandchildren. I was always on the look out for the perfect gift. I will leave FB on the 18th. I am looking forward to sitting with you out at Pony Hill. I bought a special gift for you and I will leave it for you.

Tell your grandparents, Wilma, & Peewee that I miss them. And please take care of Jim for me. Its been almost a year since he joined you. I miss both of you so much.

Mom

November 19, 2005

Josh,

I miss you

November 18, 2005

Jimmy,

Josh would of not wanted you to feel guilty about not being there for him. He treasured your friendship.

Maxine

October 31, 2005

It's been hard to put what I feel into words, but talk to you every day. You were the best partner and best friend I'll ever have. I miss you so much. Lexi is seven now and still asks about you all the time. I gave up on law enforcement after losing you and being injured myself. I finally returned to patrol work two months ago and enjoy sharing the stories of all our wild adventures with my new partners. They could never replace you. We had so much fun playing jokes and just hanging out. You always seemed to know what I was thinking. Im sorry that I left Harlem when you had asked me not to. I regret it every day. I thank you for watching over me and have felt your presence during every fight. I only wish that I had been there for you as you were for me. Im so sorry.

J GLANTZ

October 22, 2005

Hi,

The Fort Belknap Police Department will be honoring you and Suzie Gardipee at the Veteran's Day pow wow. At first I was going to go home but decided to wait for Jackass to be sentenced. Your sister Tammy will represent your family for you. She will do a good job. She suprizes me with her strength.

I will then work on your house for a couple of weeks. I bought a paint sprayer so this should be quite interesting.

I know that you are getting a kick of my flying. As you know I couldn't make it up the edge. I was just goofing off. I am going to try EMDR since the Texan Victims support chief advocates for it. Can't get any worse than it is already.

I miss you so much son.

Love, Mom

October 21, 2005

Josh,

I thought about you a lot today. More than usual. Maybe you were really watching over me today. Mike and I are leaving for Wolf Point on Thursday, to visit for the weekend, and then Sunday, we get on the train for Seattle. It is our vacation this year. Really need it. We will be front and center in November when they finally give that coward what he truly deserves. I miss your smiling face.

Melody A Zuhoski
Aunt of Joshua T. Rutherford

October 3, 2005

Josh,

I want you to know that I think about you often. Today is my birthday and it still hurts so much to know that you cannot share my special day with me. I know that wherever you are, you are probably smiling and wishing me the best today. I visited your grave a week ago, it looked good. Your family does a good job at decorating and keeping it clean. The small memento that I left a year ago, is still there. Thanks for watching over me!

Friend

September 22, 2005

Josh its been a long time. I was thinking abut Harlem last night and I wish you were still there. Jackson is going to be sentenced soon and I hope and pray that the Jury gives him the punishment that he deserves. I will be there for that day. Your family is always in my prayers.

John Colby

Officer John Colby
Williston Police Department

September 7, 2005

JOSH,
I STILL THINK ABOUT YOU EVERYDAY. THANKS MAN FOR HELPING ME THROUGH THE TOUGH TIMES AT THE ACADEMY. I CAME TO THIS JOB WITH NO EXPERIENCE AND A WHOLE LOT OF ASPERATIONS. YOU HELPED ME TO UNDERSTAND THAT WITH OUR DREAMS COME GREAT RESPONSIBILITY AND DEDICATION. I MISS THE TIMES WE TAUGHT DT'S AT THE ACADEMY TOGETHER. THOSE WERE SOME OF THE FUNNIEST TIMES I CAN REMEMBER. YOU ALWAYS HAD SOMETHING TO MAKE PEOPLE LAUGH, BUT ALSO MAKE THEM UNDERSTAND. ONE OF THE SADDEST AND PROUDEST DAYS OF MY LIFE WAS WHEN I STOOD ON PONY MOUNTAIN AT THE FUNERAL AND WATCHED ALL THOSE PATROL CARS COMING DOWN THE ROAD TOWARDS THE CEMETARY. THEY SEEMED TO GO ONE FOREVER. COPS AREN'T SUPPOSED TO CRY, BUT I DID. I STILL GET CHOKED UP JUST THINKING ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED. JOSH I PROMISS THAT I'LL ALWAYS STAND FOR WHAT'S RIGHT, MAKE MY PARTNERS SAFE AND KEEP THE TRADITION OF "THE WARRIOR CLASS, BASIC 107." THANKS.

CORPORAL TOREY KELTNER
HELENA POLICE DEPARTMENT

September 1, 2005

Josh,
I miss you so much. I heard there has been another delay in that cowards sentencing. Like your dad says, let them use up all that they have. It can't go on forever. I know that no matter what happens here on earth, he will still have to meet his maker and answer to him.

I think of you every single day. God bless you my nephew.

Melody Zuhoski
Aunt of Joshua T. Rutherford

August 30, 2005

Son,

Looks like another delay in sentencing. November 28 is the new date. Something about the mitigation attorney and Native American culture. Doesn't realize that you are also a proud Gros Ventre. Well as long as LJ stays in jail. I know that you have this under control. Please continue to give me the strength to make it throught this.

I have decided its a good thing, I will be there for your sisters and Maribeth's birthdays. Might even get to watch "wildcats" basketball. You know that your Uncle Cal is coaching and Wil is playing. Might even make it to some coyote bb.

I miss you.

Mom

August 25, 2005

happy birthday i don't care what anybody say's I LOVE YOU
Josh i miss you
jody

August 16, 2005

Joshua,

Third birthday without you. You would be 31 and your grandpa would of been 91 today. Brought chocolate cake and ice cream to work to celebrate the 28 years I had with you.

Love, Mom

Love Mom

August 16, 2005

it seems like everytime I turn around I see you in someones face. I have really been thinking of you alot lately and missing you more and more. I am looking forward to seeing your mother in a couple of months when she comes home for the sentencing. My thoughts are always with you Josh

August 11, 2005

Hi Son,

Just a quick note to let you know that I am going to try the edge at parents camp again. I still am angry over your death. Parents retreat helps me over that, as you know Jackson will finally be sentenced a day after camp. I will miss the first day of sentencing but I think I need camp more than I need to hear about his poor misunderstood childhood. You can tell I am being sarcastic can't you.

Well, son I miss you more everyday but I figure its a day closer to you.

Love Mom

July 30, 2005

Watch over me Joshua and give me your wisdom and patience. I need your love and guidance.

July 24, 2005

Together We Walk the Stepping Stones

Come, take my hand, the road is long.
We must travel by stepping stones,
No, you're not alone. I've been there,
Don't fear the darkness. I'll be with you,
We must take one step at a time,
But remember, we may have to stop awhile,
It's a long way to the other side.

We have many stones to cross,
Some are bigger than others,
Shock, denial and anger to start,
Then comes guilt ,despair and loneliness,
It's a hard road to travel, but it must be done,
It's the only way to reach the other side.

Come, slip your hand in mine,
What? Oh, yes it's strong,
I've held so many hands like yours,
Yes, mine was once small and weak like yours,
Once, you see, I had to take someone's hand,
In order to take the first step,
Ooops! You've stumbled. Go ahead and cry,
Don't be ashamed. I understand,
Let's wait here awhile so that you can get your breath,
When you're stronger, we'll go on, one step at a time,
There's no need to hurry.

Say, it's nice to hear you laugh,
Yes, I agree, the memories you shared are good,
Look, we're halfway there now,
I can see the other side,
It looks so warm and sunny,
Oh, have you noticed? We're nearing the last stone,
And you're standing alone,
And look, your hand, you've let go of mine,
We've reached the other side.

But wait, look back, someone is standing there,
They are alone and want to cross the stepping stones,
I'd better go. They need my help,
What? Are you sure?
Why, yes, go ahead, I'll wait,
You know the way,
You've been there,
Yes, I agree. It's your turn, my friend......
To help someone else cross the stepping stones.

Author Unknown

July 16, 2005

I LOVE YOU BABY!!!

July 12, 2005

Josh,

Well today is your Teague's birthday. I wish your boys could come to Denver to visit so they could go to Elitches. I said I was going there for your birthday and ride the roller coaster. Because that is something you would of enjoysed. So maybe not the roller coaster but definately the log. I love you

July 12, 2005

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